Just A Dog......

"Sorrow come in great waves, but it rolls over us...when it passes, we remain."  ---Henry James

The day finally came and the day was yesterday.

We didn't feel like we could prolong the inevitable any longer without causing her additional pain and suffering.  Lately, her stumbling had taken a significant nosedive and she only walked when she had to.  We didn't want her to get so down she couldn't use the bathroom on her own or even move at all.  She'd eat her food with her legs splayed out like the scene of Bambi skating on ice.  One day I even saw her standing on her own tail, probably not even realizing what she was doing.

Every time we talked about it, right before bed usually, I cried.  Knowing what we were going to do the next morning, I cried Thursday night and asked God what was I even supposed to pray for?  I didn't want to be strong and not cry, I wanted to feel the pain.

Friday was a gloomy day with low hanging clouds and sad colored air.  I didn't even bother to blow dry my wet hair and skipped the whole Tammy Faye Bakker getup entirely.  After we loaded her up in the truck one last time and started driving, silent tears streamed down both our faces.  We got about two miles from the house and feeling like I was headed to my own execution, I almost asked for him to take me back home. I didn't though, more than anything I didn't want him to be alone.  I think we cried the whole trip, with the windows rolled down and my half-dry hair whipping around.
When our truck passed by one of my favorite country cemeteries I had to close my eyes, I couldn't bear a reminder.  I took pictures of her with her head hanging over the side of the truck, enjoying the ride and the blowing air.

We stopped at McDonald's to buy her two cheeseburgers, one of her favorite human foods beside Popeye's fried chicken.  She whined and watched for him the whole time he was inside getting her snack.

We drove on to the vet's office and parked on the farthest end of the crowded parking lot.  I stood by the truck while he went inside and started bawling when he walked back out red faced and crying.  We cried outside beside her for a few minutes before deciding to press on and get it over with already.

True to the disease, she flopped around like a fish on land all the way to the door, until he just picked her up and carried her the rest of the way.  We walked straight through the waiting room past the other waiting pet parents and down a narrow hallway to a room at the very end.

He petted her and cried for a few minutes before taking off the pink striped collar I bought her last summer.  I couldn't pet her one last time when he asked.  It shattered my heart to see her try to follow us as we walked out the room, her open-mouth smiley face and big eyes looking at us as we left.

I wanted to stay with her and be there for the whole thing so she wouldn't be alone at the end, but it was just too much.  We couldn't stay and watch her die.

The whole waiting room was probably upset when we walked back out, everybody was looking at us crying, this time with a dogless leash.  We broke down and sobbed on each other out in the parking lot until Boots cried himself sick. 

We left.

To some people a dog is just a dog, but to Boots and me she was more than that.  I loved her and I'd only known her two years.  The sadness I felt (and still feel, I cried all night off and on; I'm crying and typing now) is at least multiplied five times for Boots since he thinks he's had her at least ten years.  He's had her so long he can't remember.  She was his baby and he loved her like a big hairy child.

All dogs go to Heaven, if they didn't why would God give us such big hearts to love them with?

Day Three

It's a well known fact that big dogs have bone problems when they get old. We've known she's had hip dysplasia for a while and medicine has helped, but the problems are worse now. She stumbles like a drunken sailor on a sea-tossed ship. It's arthritis in her spine and a box of pills that may or may not help. Here's hoping.

The Best Way to Keep Hair Out of the Carpet......

Never let it hit the ground!

The Christmas Post

Instead of buying a tree I borrowed one of my mom's.

I wrapped the presents in glittery paper.

One of the things I was looking forward to doing was picking out an ornament with Boots.

My work schedule has been hectic and I haven't been able to see him as much as I'd like and when I have seen him I've been too tired.

I was pretty disappointed that we didn't get to go pick out an ornament together, but I am so happy that Talia and her husband gave us this!

The "5" is mine, the "H" we bought, and the snowman was a handmade gift from my cousin Norman.

One of my favorite Holiday Barbie ornaments.

Boots and I did buy this one together.

The magazine that I folded into a "tree" and painted gold.

This is an alpaca from Peru that our neighbor lady's daughter brought back for us when she went there on a mission trip this fall.

The topper!

I've got a thing for glitter.

Boots' "Chloe" ornament.

Another favorite.

Dogs understand gravity.
When I get ice from the ice maker, Chloe stares at the floor in front of the refrigerator, hoping I drop a piece.

I haven't had much to write lately.
There's just not much too much happening.
I'm just working and doing wedding stuff and house stuff.
But by not writing I'm neglecting the purpose of the blog.
(Purpose? 
Oh, yeah! 
To keep people our family fah fah away informed of our happenings!)

We had a wedding shower the past two Saturdays and got lots of great presents.
Boots and I are going to have plenty of new things to use in our house.
We got nice, new, fluffy towels.
Shiny pots and brand new spoons!
Baskets, and decorations, and tools!
I'm dying to cook something with all my new wares but I haven't had the time yet.
Expect lots of cooking posts in October.

I've been writing 'thank you' notes until my eyes cross.
Don't you just love writing 'thank you' notes?
(I may be sarcastic about a lot of things but from the bottom of my heart I love writing 'thank you' notes.
I like paying bills too.
There's just some allure about writing checks, licking envelopes, and sticking stamps.
Maybe because it's only 'special' occasions that you get to do such.)

Boots and I finally decided on the flooring for the majority of the house!
Hallelujah!
Indecision makes my head spin.
I like to have things decided out right away so I don't have to stress over the possible outcomes.

Possible outcomes......
New business venture idea in the works.

Dear Boots,
I am becoming increasingly attached to the blue bathroom each time I see it.
Please, do not destroy.
Save your creative destructive energies for the grand house we're building in our heads that will someday be on the ground.
Much love,
Rachel

You know what's great about all this hectic wedding stuff?
Ya know, besides the cake and punch?
I get to see so many people that I haven't seen in a while and/or don't get to see very often.
I can't wait until the wedding!
There will be (I hope!) so many people there that love us and I hope we get to visit with them all.

Chloe has moved out of my apartment and down to our house.
She chewed up a wall in my bathroom yesterday as payback for the trouble she got in that morning and I cannot have teeth marks on everything that doesn't belong to me that I have to pay for when I move out.
I'm not sure if Nikki is sad her friend is gone or glad to have all the attention to herself again.
I hope they mesh as well as they have been meshing next month when they have to live together for good.
I hope me and Chloe started meshing better.
Mesh, mesh, mesh.

Cake, love, and funerals,
Rachel

Do you see this sweet face?

You would never imagine that this sweet face belongs to a monster.

A monster that is bound and determined to destroy all rocks, stones, and pebbles by means of digestion!

A monster with aging teeth and gums, that would rather enjoy the crunch of ancient melded grit than Beneful!

Do you see this coffee table?

This coffee table in front of this blue yoga mat, said blue yoga mat shoved up under and beside the metal screen that keeps things (people, animals, junk) from falling in the fireplace?

All this junk that has to keep the rock eating monster from taking all the rocks out of the fireplace so that we don't get dinged when we move out of our apartment?!

I've been busy today.
I went to the post office, didn't get a thing.
It just disappoints me not to get any mail.
I went to the bank, took out some money (by the way, large amounts of cash make me nervous.  I was shaking like a drug dealer!) I went to my mom's office, I went to the wedding store to pick up two bridesmaids' dresses.
I went to another bank, got rid of that money, I went to the mall, bought nice hand soap at Bath and Body Works, went to Belk, bought three dresses because I was by myself and could not decide.
Went to Target, bought a few groceries but mostly magic dog washing potion (vinegar and antibacterial soap).
Went home, made myself cheese quesadillas for lunch.
Washed both dogs (ever washed a stubborn German Shepard?) in magic potion.
And proceeded to be lazy for the rest of the afternoon.
There you have it.

New Family Members

This is a longish update.

I'm not so good at daily posting.

Last Tuesday after work, I left my town for the next biggest city to hang out at "Camp Nana."

Camp Nana is something my soon-to-be maw-in-law came up with as a time to visit with her grandbabies.

She teaches them Bible verses and they paint crafts (I'm not brave enough for paint and kids!), she enforces good behavior and manners and expects fairness.

Camp Nana is a good way to practice your baby skills.

Such as not exploding when seven miniature humans all demand more chicken nuggets! at the same time!

Pee stinks.

Hot pee, cold pee, diaper pee, toilet pee.

It all stinks.

Camp Nana teaches you to eat when you have a chance.

Kids are an excellent diet.

You expend all of your energy chasing after them and caring for them.

Then when it's time to eat, you have to feed them and you forget to feed yourself until you're laying in the bed going to sleep and by that time you're too exhausted to move, much less fix yourself something to eat!

After I left Camp Nana Thursday afternoon I headed south to Boots' house to pick up his "child" Chloe and take her to my house.

Chloe is the one on the right.

The one on the left is my "child" Nikki.

You can't really tell in this picture but Chloe's right ear was shaved when she had surgery on a broken blood vessel.

The vet said she needed to stay inside a while so I'm keeping her until we get everything finalized with our house and Boots moves in.

Nikki is super hyper and jumps around all day everyday but Chloe is really chill and always relaxed.

She just sat in the front seat of the car looking out the window on the ride back.

Very calm and serene.

Staring out at the cows.

Really staring at the cows.

Staring like it would have been embarrassing for you if you were in the store and your kid was staring like that.

Is it still bad to stare or have we as society gotten over that since its widely accepted to be different and nowadays you want people to stare at you?

Please advise.

Chloe understands German.

I speak English.

We had a bit of a communication problem for the first few days but I think we've conquered the language barrier, at least I hope so.

Two dogs is a lot of work.

Its almost like having children.

And tell me this, why do dogs eat grass when they think they're going to puke?

Do you think that trick works on humans?