Yesterday morning, Boots and I went to our Preparing for Childbirth class at the hospital we plan to have our baby at. I went to work for an hour (we're insanely busy right now!) then met him there just before the three hour class started. We had the same instructor as last time, but two other couples and one girl with her mom that we'd never met before. One of the couples has the same due date as our baby, too.
We started out by going through a book that the hospital provided and listening to the instructor as she shared some general information about labor and delivery and the process of being admitted if the birth isn't scheduled. None of this information was new to me since I've already read several books about childbirth and have at least one more to go.
After a bathroom break (pregnant women always gotta go!) she cranked up the overhead projector and without any "graphic images and nudity" warning at all we were watching a video about four different pregnant women and their labors and deliveries and got clear shots of their nekkid lady parts. Yikes.
I hate watching tv shows and videos of this stuff. Why do all these women look like somebody taped them to the stripe in the middle of the interstate and let 70,000 18 wheelers run over them? Are they putting on for the camera? Somehow, I don't think that's how it really happens. Why would you want to have a camera crew in your general area when you're having a baby, much less "in your business"? Ay yi yi......
She asked for questions several times and although I had several I wanted to ask I got the feeling that people not as crunchy as me, i.e. everyone, weren't going to find them very beneficial.
Like, "Why can't I have anything to eat or drink?" I knew the answer would be "because you'll aspirate and DIE!" You're allowed ice chips and water from the time you're admitted until the baby is born. You can have suckers and hard candy in your mouth, but that's it. In the event of an emergency, I am not worried about aspirating and dying. In the event of a non-emergency in which I can't eat for-let's guess a nice, round 12 hours- I am worried about my sugar getting low, getting the shakes, puking everywhere, and then having some sort of "get the baby out fast" emergency. I can't go long periods of time with having something to eat. How am I supposed to live?
About five minutes into the book information I kind of got the vibe that the hospital is very pro-drugs. They make more money off of you that way, right? They have to. There was much talk about different types of pain relief meds and only a few little words about "going natural" and "you'll need to learn relaxation techniques." That's it. That's all she had to say about that. Apparently, when someone's arm gets gripped and "give me the meds!" is shouted through clenched teeth they have no qualms about administering the drugs. There was never any mention at all about how all that crap affects the baby. Zero. None.
After the video we packed into the elevator and rode upstairs to what I call "the baby floor." We toured the labor, delivery, and recovery room where the baby will be born and then the OB room where you spend the rest of your time after the baby is born. Barring any complications, you're "released" when the baby is 48 hours old. We peeked in the nursery at two fairly fresh babies and looked in the waiting rooms filled with bored people. We didn't go to the operating room (yay!) where the emergencies happen or the NICU where the sick babies are (double yay!).
And that concluded our class. I got what I ultimately wanted (tour of the facilities), but left with lots of questions. The man's role was never mentioned. Is this something Boots is supposed to just show up to and watch? I've read about how the "support person" is going to be your best asset, but when will he learn that? Does instinct take over at some point and he'll become my shining knight in the LDR room?
Don't get all up in arms because I didn't ask the lady my questions. I'm saving them for the doctor when I go Thursday. Hope he's ready. I'll be packing a birth plan.
**I realize that the hippie way is not for everyone and that I'm weird (ask my uncle) and anyone that wants to have a baby without meds is crazy (ask my aunt.) If you're reading this and feeling slightly (or majorly) offended, that was not my intention. To each his (her) own. Your choice is your choice, regardless of what you choose. I'm not trying to make anybody mad, I'm just sharing what's in my head in my space of the Internet. Disclaimer, over and out!**